I found a bag of Steve's congratulatory graduation cards and I remember fondly his graduation party in Ohio and all the fun we had with old friends and family. Oddly enough, coming back was full of the realization that Grove City wasn't our home anymore. That was somewhat painful to realize, that the place where we both grew up and lived for most of our lives wasn't home any longer.
It has been a little over a year since that trip and both Steve and I have changed so much. Steve is in college now, a sophomore at Lee University. The change in him has been amazing. He isn't my little boy anymore, but a man finding his way and preparing for the future God has for him. He began as a freshman studying Missions, and this summer, while driving home from an evening with friends, heard very clearly the call to become a pastor. My totally freaked out son came straight to my bedroom, where I was sleeping, to ask me to pray as he submitted his will to the Lord.
Since that prayer, God has graciously confirmed His call on Steve, from opportunities to minister as a part of a worship band all over Tampa, to ministering to a tow-truck driver and speaking truth into his life, to getting a call from his old Resident Director asking him if he was interested in a Resident Chaplain position for one of the Dorms at Lee. A position that he did get hired for. He also continues to lead worship at various events at the University. He is being stretched and prepared. And this mother is grateful.
Over the past two years, I have been stretched to let go of small, ineffective thinking and actions that keep God in a nice tidy box. I have been challenged to look at and view people differently, and to pray differently. My heart has been turned inside out, and I will never be the same. The four walls of the church building are no longer my home; but the world outside with all the hurting people and the ones who need truth. Please do not misunderstand, I have not forsaken the assembly of believer's, learning about the word from my pastor, and actively serving where the Lord has planted me. But the church is not my focus, but the people who are created in the very image and likeness of the Lord. I am actively asking to be transformed so that Heaven invades everywhere the Lord takes me, through me.
So I am out of the box, where it can be terrifying, and where I can get wounded. But there is no greater place of freedom to be. So I am trusting that my Lord will work out all things and provide all that I need. He has never let me down.
I am transitioning from raising my son to walking in what the Lord has called me as an individual to walk in. I am still unemployed, but have an interview tomorrow. I also am in school full-time. I am still dreaming of being a published author, and I know my English degree will definitely improve my writing skills. I have kicked around the idea of becoming a teacher, somewhere in the world. So we will see.
That is all for now. Not sure who really reads this anymore, so feel free to leave a comment or two. It would be great to hear from you :)
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